It finally clicked. This was a HUGE deal for her! She spent all the focus & energy she had creating it to the best of her abilities.
It was PIKACHU, FOR THE LOVE.
Me- "Does your heart hurt?
Her- "YEAH!"
Me- "Where?"
Her- "Right here!" & she pointed to her chest
Me- "I am your mommy. You're safe with me. I will hold you as long as you need to cry. It's okay to be sad about your picture. You tried very hard & you wanted it to be perfect."
She continued to cry for A LONG TIME, YOU GUYS.
It felt like FOREVER.
It was worth noting that this was at 5:15 pm and she was HUNGRY, and she had not gone to bed on time the night before. (ALWAYS A FACTOR) I started to remind her of a time when Lyla thought she was never going to learn how to do a handstand, and she kept trying & trying & trying and she learned how to do it. She remembered this vividly, so I tried explaining- "You want to draw Pikachu perfect, but this was your first time ever drawing Pikachu! You will learn how, but you have to keep trying. If we practice drawing Pikachu every day over & over, you will learn how to draw him(her?) perfect."
She began to get up after this & move forward, but came back to hug me a few times, and gave me a kiss, calling me her favorite nickname she has for me.
I felt so connected to her.
I was able to show her I could weather her storm.
I could handle her BIG emotions & keep her safe from herself.
She needed me to understand that it was a REALLY BIG DEAL.
Whether our kids have lost the ability to go to school, the family pet has died, their favorite mask is in the wash, or they can't draw something perfectly...
IT'S A BIG DEAL.
When we believe this, we can intentionally react/act in a way that validates & connects with their whole self, influencing their behavior through our example in the MOST POWERFUL way.
Do you wish this was your "go-to" level of patience & response?
IT CAN BE!
Schedule a call to chat about what's possible when we're able to break down all the competing factors, teach new approaches, and see behavior change in everyone!
www.parentingwholeheartedly.com/coaching
What is a BIG DEAL to your child?
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